We got hitched!
9 years and 9 months to the day we got together, 1 year and 4 months to the day we got engaged and 11 months to the day we booked our wedding - we got married in a 3 day weekend of chaos, festivities and stormy weather.
I’ll be going into the who, the what, the why and the wherefore in the next month so for today, here’s a little run down of how we celebrated.
Thursday 6th February 2020-
Yes, ya gal only took one day of annual leave before her wedding because I am nothing if not brilliant at putting stress on myself. I spent the morning packing up my car, Jos’ truck and the work van whilst Jos cleaned the house and made up the beds ready for the guests that were staying in our house over the wedding weekend.
We set off in convoy for Rosedew Farm, our wedding venue and home for the weekend which is about 10 minutes from my Mum’s house and 25 from ours. I listened to ‘Play That Funky Music’ by Wild Cherry and the sun was blazing and I had my sunnies on and I was in the absolute best mood.
When we got to the venue Jos’ Dad emptied the works van and headed home and we got on unpacking our bits and bobs and took all our suitcases, outfits and a million other things into the cottage we were staying in. My Mum arrived early afternoon and we had one of those perfect lunches you didn’t know you needed, of fresh crusty french stick, salty butter, fruit, crisps and cheese which set us up lovely for the day.
We spent the afternoon decorating the main barn as much as we could for the Friday night event. I set up the pub quiz prize and the chalkboards, Jos learnt how to use the speakers and set up the microphone and together we laid out 7 or 8 tables for guests ready with Vale Cider bottle openers, pens and the all important quiz questions. My Mum in the meantime adorned the bannisters with fresh foliage, leaves and ivy she’d picked from her garden that morning and we listened to our wedding playlist to ‘check the acoustics’ (get us in the partying mood).
By the time we were done it was dark and we spent a mad hour or so running round all the accommodation putting out welcome packs for our guests. The farm has 5 self catering stone cottages right on the doorstep of the main barn, plus 6 log cabins and 6 motel rooms at the end of the lane, not to mention a campsite, shepherd’s huts and some more cabins so we had around 40 guests staying on site with us I wanted to make feel at home. In each cottage we laid out a welcome card, a jam jar of daffodils, welsh cakes, tea, coffee, a loaf of bread, butter, jam, marmalade, marmite, kitchen roll, toilet roll, a few pints of milk and some keyring torches to find their way back and forth the barns in the dark.
By the time my Mum left we were cracking on for 8pm and we drove out to our local Dominos and picked up a pizza (and sides of course) for our tea in bed, before staying the night on our own in our chosen cottage.
Friday 7th February 2020 -
We had the pick of all weekends in February when we booked our wedding so we decided on the one we did for two reasons - the Sunday was my Mum’s birthday and we thought that might be fun and it meant we could get married on the 7th. We got together on the 7th May 2010 and engaged on the 7th October 2018 and having our wedding anniversary on 7th February 2020 had a pretty sweet ring to it.
We woke up on the morning together and got ready together, Jos in a Primark suit, me in a gold New Look dress and we drove together to the local registry office where we met his parents, siblings and in laws and my parents, brother, sister in law and nieces. It felt a little surreal and not particularly formal thinking we were off to get married and I wasn’t nervous at all until we were taken off for our quick pre marriage interviews to check we were who we say we are.
The ceremony was performed by one of my work colleagues who is a registrar when she’s not in work with me and that immediately put us at ease, made it so informal and personal and really made the difference on the day. Jos’ parents took the photos, my oldest niece held my flowers for me, Jos’ brother gave us our rings and my brother and his sister were our witnesses. My littlest niece crawled around the floor enjoying herself, we had a good laugh and we were legally wed in under 25 minutes.
We split up for an hour and some family popped home, my family went to the beach to fly my niece’s kite and Jos and I braved the seaside with his parents who took a load of amazing wedding photos of us at the colourful beach huts in Barry Island. We were frozen to the bone by the time we got back but it was a load of fun and lots of people realised what we were up to said congratulations which was very sweet and then Jos’ Mum put bows on the truck for us to drive about it.
Brunch was booked for 11.30 at a gorgeous little cafe Romilly’s where we met back up with the family to celebrate. We had a huge table for 14, the baby slept and we had countless pots of tea, stacks of pancakes, mega plates of full breakfasts, avocado, bacon rolls and they very kindly gave us a bottle of prosecco to toast which all my sister in laws thoroughly enjoyed for us. I’d arranged gifts for all the family which I’ll link to in depth in a future post and we handed them out, along with hand written thank you cards of appreciation for their support in our non traditional wedding day and I made a few of them cry which was my goal all along.
After parting ways so the fam could all go home, feed the farm, get the kids with the in laws and get ready to come back out again, we drove ourselves back to the barns and immediately got to work finishing up the last few lodges - all in our wedding finery. We headed back to our cottage and got to work finishing up for the weekend, making chocolate strawberries and unpacking the next load of boxes and bags my Mum brought down with her.
The afternoon was spent eating leftover pizza and greeting all the guests who were arriving for the three days and loads of hugs, congratulations and directing lost friends and family to their accommodation. Before we knew it, we hurriedly got ready and headed into the main barns for our pub quiz. I had said since Effi’s wedding in March 2018 that I wanted a pub quiz in our wedding because hers was so fun and when we booked a three day extravaganza I knew it was the perfect Friday night activity to get all the guests to know each other.
I created the quiz myself, with questions about us, and we split the room into 8 teams. The pub quiz was of course sponsored by Vale Cider and our scrumpy was flowing and we had fish and chips in trays to help everyone mop it up. I chickened out of being quiz master at the last minute (I was by that point feeling reasonably faint, sick and nervy with everything the weekend had to offer) and luckily for me Jos had had a cider or two so was well up for public speaking, something he absolutely would not do under any normal circumstance.
Jos was an absolute showman on form, a stand up comic and had everyone in stitches with a headache from laughing as he embellished every quiz answer, every story and I was told by many a guest that his tangents combined with my pleading and begging to get on with it (and taking subsequent drinks off him) was a match made in heaven. He received a standing ovation from a few tables of friends for one particular story and if you want to see the famous bat impression, you can see it in my insta story highlights but I suggest you turn your volume down a jot.
Saturday 8th February 2020 -
After a 1am bedtime I wasn’t feeling overly fresh when my alarm woke me at 7.30 but I was feeling a damn side fresher than Jos who’d been awake most of the night and was nursing a pretty severe hangover. He stayed in bed until lunch time, munching on burnt toast and generally feeling sorry for himself and I set about cracking on for another days work before the big party. I took Jos’ auntie into town to the train station, my Mum made me a cuppa and then we set about decorating the barn for the main event.
The wedding venue is as DIY as you want to make it and we went all in. I’ll be talking more in depth about the decor but we made it all ourselves and we had a U shaped top table to fit all 14 immediate members of family not to mention 8 tables for 80 guests (including 8 kids and babies) - all of which needed laying, setting and decorating. We worked as a team, my Mum, myself and Gaynor who owns the barns and my Dad and brother pitched up at the very end to carry heavy boxes, get rid of all of our rubbish and slice your hand open on the cake knives if you’re my Dad. I was adamant I didn’t want any help from anyone other than Mum when it came to setting up because I knew where everything was to go, I had a plan in place and a vision in mind but as these things do, it took hours longer than I anticipated so the arrival of Mel, Sarah and Hannah with about half an hour to spare was like seeing three angels walk into the room. They followed me round the room laying favours, name card holder and place names on every table, helped my Mum finish the foliage and took box upon box to our accommodation and helped me hang the all important ‘wedding’ sign to the stairs and we were good to go.
By the time I’d finished setting up there was half an hour to go before guests started arriving back in the barns to party and I was to shoot off before anyone saw me so I could get ready and not get stuck chinwagging. My brother did a quick 5 minute rescue mission for me when I realised I’d not finished one of the lodges and then my Mum’s bestie turned up to do my hair, our photographer turned up to start snapping and Jos and I passed like ships in the night as he headed into the barns to socialise and I headed back to our cottage to get dressed.
Wales were playing Ireland away in the 6 Nations on the weekend we chose so I knew as big rugby loving pair and a party full of Welsh people, it was a no brainer to have it on. I didn’t get to enjoy it with everyone else, knowing it would be my only chance to get ready so Jos and around 30/40 guests enjoyed it in the comfort of the bar. I’d laid out bar snacks, crisps and munchies, Vale Cider was on free and there were tiny Welsh and Irish flags to cheer the teams on. I think the less said about the score the better but from what I understand, everyone really enjoyed themselves (and the snacks) all the same.
I meanwhile was in my cottage on my own with my Mum’s best friend who very kindly curled my hair for me and I sat watching the match on our tiny TV whilst methodically transferring the wedding playlist from my phone to my iPad. Nothing like last minute. I remember it going from just being me and her chatting away to a flurry of people, Simon the photographer coming in to finalise shots, my brother and sister in law bringing the kids in, my Mum showing up having got ready herself, Sarah bringing round my floral crown and one of my oldest friends and her Mum popping in to say hi - and it was only when Gabbie plonked a cuppa and a round of buttery toast on my lap did I realise I hadn’t eaten all day.
I had less than an hour to get ready when my hair was done but I still managed to do my own makeup, apply my falsies (which fell off before we’d even done photos) and paint my own nails and Jos had about 10 minutes where he rushed in, stripped the rugby jersey off and was in his suit in the blink of an eye. Everyone left and my Mum zipped up my dress and we were off to take photos. There was only about half an hour to get snaps in before the daylight went and the party started so Jos, Simon and I ran around the fields of Rosedew (in my yellow wellies of course) and took windy cold photos and pretended to be warm. One of my absolute favourite memories of the day was rounding the corner to take photos in the middle of the cottages and it was the first time anyone had seen my dress and everyone was whooping and hollering and waving from the door of the main barn. We churned family out for photos like they were on a conveyor belt and got all the shots in we needed before heading back into the bar and the warmth.
By the time guests were seated it was dark and the fairy lights of the barn were twinkling and we got my Uncle to compare and announce our entry (a job he was born to do, and one I roped him into many times of the course of the weekend). We sat down for food at 5.30pm and enjoyed a quiet hour or so eating steak and ale pie and mash and veggies from Farmers Pantry. It’s true what they say, brides never eat that much and I was SO determined it wasn’t going to happen to me but hey, I paid £16.50 for myself to eat about 3 bits of pastry and a bit of mash, but everyone else cleared their plates.
As we were breaking tradition in 99% of every other way, Jos opted out of doing a speech and we didn’t have a best man so my Dad and I did the speeches - starting with me. I had it written on my phone and I didn’t have a mic and I think someone filmed it but I haven’t listened to myself back but people laughed and everyone clapped so I think it was ok. My Dad was incredibly nervous but incredibly funny and gave a shout out to one of my oldest pals and suitably embarrassed Jos so everyone was thrilled.
After a bit of mingling (there is SO much mingling to be done!) my Uncle announced the first dance and after a bit of fumbling with the speaker and the iPad on our part, we danced to the first chorus of Tom Walker’s ‘Just You & I’ and then called my brother, Mum and nieces plus a load of willing friends onto the dance floor and then when that finished, we sped up to Elton’s ‘Saturday Night’s Alright for Fighting’ and the party really started. Evening guests were arriving from 8pm so there was a lot of hugging and greeting people and flitting back and forth but all the while I had my little shadow with me. My niece’s were my bridesmaids but the baby is only 10 months old so it was the four year old who really enjoyed the weekend and barely left my side. She mingled with me, if she wasn’t in my arms or stuck on my hip she was hanging off my hand and one of the last things I remember doing before she left was being crouched down on the floor of the toilets with her in my wedding dress and veil thinking how did it come to this. The lights dimmed and the fairy lights sparkled and she was in awe of it all and I’d deliberately put some George Ezra (one of her favs) on the the playlist when I knew she’d still be there so my brother, Mum, myself and both my nieces danced and I got incredibly hot and incredibly tired but one of my most treasured memories from the weekend will always be me and my smallest pal dancing on our own on the dance floor.
The kids were taking home by their in laws at 9ish and from then till 1am I was a hot mess of dancing, trying to speak to everyone, greeting people, saying goodbye to people and not spending much time with Jos. I was informed there was an amazing macarena which most of the crowd got involved in that I missed, plus a Grease mega mix and a very aggressive hokey kokey that only 2 guests can remember. I made my third shoe change of the evening into my battered old converse and used a dash to my cottage to drop off my head piece and veil as a quiet five minutes to myself - and to navigate using the loo in my dress!!
Definitely one of the highlights for me was roping all our friends into doing sparklers on the stairs and they dutifully lined both sides and froze in the cold and battled the wind and sparklers that wouldn’t light and safe to say they committed to it. We had ninety seconds of screaming, cheering, laughing, whoopering and hollering as Jos, Simon and I ran up and down the steps and they all twirled and twizzled sparklers in our faces and it was such a laugh - I cannot wait to get those photos back.
When 1am came round and the lights were coming up and everyone was suitably smashed and I killed everyone’s vibe by accidentally turning Mr Brightside off just at the good bit, we stuck on two bangers to finish. The hardy 25/30 odd guests still standing formed a big circle on the dancefloor and we all linked arms and stomped and sang our hearts out to Jon Denver’s Country Roads (a moment I am every thankful my pal filmed) and then finished the evening off with a classic - Don’t Stop Me Now before all refusing my Dad’s drunken calls for poker till 4am and headed to bed at 3 after a family bag of crisps to myself whilst Jos was snoring next to me.
Sunday 9th February 2020 -
A 3am bedtime and a 8am wakeup, having not brushed my hair or taken off my makeup was not the one but I left Jos groggily waking up and went into the barns with my long suffering Mum and started the big clear up before breakfast. We boxed up the leftover cake, tidied as much of the table decorations as we could and then guests started making their way sleepily down the muddy hill for their full English. We had about 60 guests either stay or come back for breakfast and they all snaked their way around the venue down to the kitchens to get a plate full (another meal I didn’t manage to eat!!).
My niece’s were back by this point and my biggest niece, Jos and I arranged a quick surprise birthday ‘cake’ made up of a stack of hot cross buns with candles on and the whole party sang happy birthday to my surprised, embarrassed but happy mother. The rest of the morning was a flurry of activity saying goodbye to everyone as they left in dribs and drabs and headed home and by this point Storm Ciara had kicked in so the odd fence and even tree was down and people were getting suitably soaked and blown away.
As the final guests left Jos’ family helped us pack up the venue and our suitcases and loaded them into the truck and the work van which they then set off in to take everything back to our house and Jos and I (and my tiny 4 year old shadow) cleared up our cottage and packed for our mini moon. We braved the weather over to my Mum’s cottage after lunch where the baby was napping and everyone but my Mum was hungover and then we finally had a minutes peace to sit down and relax for five and enjoy my Mum’s birthday. My niece very seriously distributed wedding presents and Mum’s birthday cards and gifts and when we were all feeling up to it (or more accurately thinking we needed to get out before the storm got worse) we packed up the cars and drove in convoy, beeping and waving, away from our home for the weekend and set off on our mini moon.
A total cliche but undoubtedly one of the most fun, hilarious, chaotic, hungry, sleepy, busy, best weekends of my life.